So many questions …
- Why do I want to do a website?
- How do I go about doing it?
- Where do I even start?
- Who do I need help from … in what way?
- How much £ will it cost me?
- What do I want to include?
- Who do I want to see it?
- How can I keep it under control so that it doesn’t overwhelm me?
- What checks & balances do I need in place so it doesn’t overstimulate me?
- Do I need permission from people to include their names or photos?
- What does my website give me?
- What does my website give my family & close friends?
- What could my website give others?
- Could I make any £ money from my website somehow in the future?
- Could it become my £ legacy for Mark, Claire, Danni & Jo ?
- Could it provide for my future care home needs if required?
My website gives me a work purpose, routine & a structure to my day. It is my way of expressing myself or explaining when talking is just too hard or emotional or complex … it’s my unique life project in 60 pages.
It is empowering, cathartic, emotional, liberating, redemptive, experiential, quirky & powerful all at the same time. It brings meaning & clarity regarding my life as I live it now whilst also helping me understand & deal with the past. It improves my confidence & self esteem and is a personal outlet for my creative energy & photography.
However equally I do at times wrestle with keeping it under control & can find it very challenging . When I am having too many thoughts & ideas it needs daily monitoring, managing & controlling because I can very quickly become overstimulated for a few days and then I have to step away & regroup.
This happened repeatedly when working on the photo gallery section. I end up overloading myself & then need to back off. After x3 weeks of this I realised it was due to repeated scrolling through 2,500 photos to find the images I wanted that day which was triggering all sorts of emotional memories so my head ended up overloaded and in a daily spin ! Clearly I needed to take positive action so although it was tough I spent x2 weeks deleting & decluttering my mac thumbnails to get them under control. By May 2018 I had worked hard on letting go of so many images & personal memories … it became a daily photo deletathon effort but was worth it … am now down to 800 and feel calmer for that.
I still have a need to make sense of my bipolar world & tell my story in a way that may help others. I think I am on the right track at last & will welcome thoughts & feedback from my support group as my website evolves over time. It’s also my way of giving back to those who have helped me along the way. I have a strong need to share & still want to make a difference in some way . I like to see evidence of what I have achieved & what I am capable of.
When I feel the time is right to go live it will be done in a controlled way (so I don’t get overwhelmed) with my support group one at a time .
Phase 1 Geoff tech (1) = wordpress set up / new web pages / 2mb photos
Phase 2 World in Pictures section / tell & start to show early steps
Phase 3 Geoff tech (2) = section headings /web pages / A4 page layout
Phase 4 Photo Gallery under 2.0mb / photo gallery create new pages
Phase 5 Photo delete / add thumbnails size kb / photo gallery 10
Phase 6 live test = Claire / Kim / Jackie / Marj / Martin / Mark / Phil
Phase 7 June Dr Singh Psychiatrist / Dr Charles GP
Phase 8 July Geoff tech / Photo Gallery 10 live / start to give biz cards
Phase 9 August / Golf section live
Phase 10 September & October / Mental Health section prep
Phase 11 November / Mental Health section live / SG feedback
Phase 12 December / My Wobbly World … Xmas
Pace & Control
- Geoff tech phases x3 monthly
- morning work only / shut down mac computer & walk away from desk
- x1 hour max / less is more
- web free days / web free weekends
- up to x5 photos per web page
- tinker time to edit / proof read
- x1 new page per week / key web page of the wek
- resist urge to go live too soon
- Decide on section headings / less is more re pages
- Decide on x10 best photos for photo gallery pages
A Better Web Way
- quiet web morning work without tv or radio or music on
- resist = going back on website after family visits
- resist = going back on website after meeting up with good friends
- resist = going back on website after psych / medical appointments
- don’t over plan tomorrow’s web work
- let it take me where it wants to go
- approach it with my professional head on … not my emotional head !
x3 YEAR PLAN
- 2018 Create & refine / share with my support group / get their feedback
- 2019 About Me section = x3 – 12 month plan / then start to share more widely
- 2020 £ make some money !
2019 STEPS
- January Dr Singh meeting / About Me section
- February test Monday create key page / thursday edit / weekend web free plan
- March feedback to Dr Singh
So many steps … so many moments … so pleased & proud